Put Your Boots On
Have the boots that brought you this far become too small for the person you're becoming?
Maybe your role has changed.
Maybe your responsibilities have grown.
Maybe the work that once defined you no longer fills your days.
Are you still trying to prove your value by doing what you’ve always done?
Have you stepped so far away from the work you love that you need to return to it for a while?Or is life asking you to take on a new kind of responsibility?
What might it mean to honor the person you were while making room for who you are becoming?
When my wife and I were both teaching, I started Citadel Fence & Deck as a way to build something for our family.
In the beginning, there wasn’t much separation between owning the company and doing the work. I wore the toolbelt. I carried the lumber. I dug holes, set posts, built fences, framed decks, solved problems, and cleaned up at the end of the day.
If Citadel was on a job, my boots were on the ground.
Those boots represented hard work, responsibility, and a willingness to do whatever needed to be done to create something of my own.
Over time, the company grew. I hired skilled builders and developed crews I could trust. Instead of working on one project at a time, I learned to coordinate several jobs at once. While one crew built a fence, another could frame a deck, and I could order materials and plan the next project.
Stepping away from the tools made the company more efficient. I was no longer just building decks and fences. I was building a business.
But somewhere along the way, I stopped putting my boots on.
Toward the end of this season, I decided to get back onto a few job sites. I pulled out the tools, worked alongside the guys, and started building again.
And something unexpected happened.
I remembered how much I enjoyed it.
There is something deeply satisfying about standing back at the end of the day and seeing what your own hands helped create. A pile of lumber becomes a deck. An open property becomes a finished fence. An idea becomes something solid that a family will use for years.
Putting my boots back on reconnected me with the reason I started.
It also helped me see that my boots had changed.
For years, I thought putting my boots on meant physically being on the job site. But as the company grew, leadership became a different kind of work.
Coordinating crews was a new set of boots.
Training people was a new set of boots.
Solving problems before they reached the job site was a new set of boots.
Creating momentum so several families could earn a living through the company was a new set of boots.
The mistake would have been believing the only “real work” was the work I could do with my own hands.
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It's not about how much time we have, but how we spend it and who we spend it with.
— Michael Drake, The Paradox of a Mortal Mind
Here's the truth we're taught to avoid
Growth Means Learning to Wear New Boots
We often connect our value to a role we know well: the builder, the worker, the caregiver, the expert, the person everyone relies on.
Those roles can give us purpose. They can also become a familiar place to hide when life is asking us to grow.
Growth may mean stepping out of the role that first made us successful and learning to contribute in a different way.
The teacher becomes a leader.
The worker becomes a mentor.
The parent who once did everything for a child learns to step back and let them grow.
The person known for physical effort discovers that their judgment, patience, or experience is now what others need.
That change can feel uncomfortable. We may worry that stepping back means we matter less. Or we may miss the satisfaction of doing the work ourselves.
Sometimes the answer is to return to the old work for a while—to reconnect with the people, remember what brought us joy, and see our progress from a new perspective.
Other times, we need to accept that the work has changed and step into a new role.
The Paradox of a Mortal Mind reminds us that our seasons are finite. We don’t remain beginners, builders, parents of young children, or the person everyone depends on in the same way forever. Our roles change because life moves—and we are meant to move with it.
The question isn’t whether your boots still fit.
The question is whether they fit the person you’re becoming.
Core Lesson
Honor the work that brought you here, and stay open to the work life is asking of you now.
1. Your Role Can Change Without Your Value Changing
You may contribute differently than you used to. Your experience, judgment, and ability to help others grow can be just as valuable as the work you once did yourself.
2. Returning Can Help You Remember
Going back to an old role for a while can reconnect you with the people, skills, or joy that started your journey. You can revisit something without needing to return to it permanently.
3. Growth May Require a New Identity
The next season may ask you to lead, teach, delegate, or let someone else take the lead. A new role doesn’t erase what came before. It builds on it.
This Week's Action
Think about one role in your life that has changed.
Ask yourself:
Are you still trying to wear the same boots you wore five or ten years ago?
Have you mistaken stepping back for becoming less valuable?
Have you moved so far from work that once brought you joy that you need to return to it even for a day?
What new role might life be asking you to try?
Choose one small step: pick up the old tools, share what you’ve learned, let someone else take responsibility, or make space to practise a new role.
What would it look like to honour the boots that brought you here while stepping into the ones that will carry you forward?
Ready to go deeper? The Paradox of a Mortal Mind explores how remembering that our time is finite can help us participate more fully in each season of life.
The Mortal Mind Debrief™ is coming soon—a free reflection journal to help you explore the book’s ideas in your own life.
Mortal Mind Tiny Experiences™ is coming soon, with 15-minute reflection and journaling experiences to help you pause, think, and take a meaningful next step.
LEGACY COLLECTIVE™ is coming soon as a Facebook group for people who want to live with greater intention and build a meaningful legacy.
If you're navigating grief, family distance, or the quiet weight of conversations that haven't happened yet, I'd be honored to work through it with you. I have a small number of 1:1 coaching spot available for people ready to do the real work.
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